Stupid phanfic, let me get you out of my head with my own words

I sat across you,
Hands holding, choking even, my words.
Constricting my throat pushing down every thoughts and swallowing every sounds desperate to escape these lips.

You cry.
And I hurt inside but the smile on my face will never betray my emotions; it never had.
You speak about your dark life.
And my abyss carried forth from my past fights to arise, to make an appearance and pride on how much darker it is compared to you.
You whimper slightly, glad that i'm here for you.
And I numb my heart totally, rejecting every warmth it desired from your smiles, because I do not know how to feel anymore.

Im glad my little store bought ray of sunshine turned your night around,
But not even your pretty laughs can echo in my abandoned heart.
You're finally happy, and it's finally time for me to leave.
I've saved you from your pain but noone can save me from mine.